“But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do” – Galatians 5:16-17 (ESV)
It was a late summer afternoon as I settled at my porch table. My brushes and paint palette were spread out before me. A pigment-stained wad of paper toweling sat at my right hand; a water pot filled with cloudy liquid on my left. My unfinished painting lay in front of me.
I groaned.
As a very amateur watercolorist my rather ambitious intention was to capture a sweet memory of our recent family vacation at Canandaigua Lake. The photo reference was snapped from the deck of our rental home. It depicted the serene body of water surrounded by hills amassed with rich foliage. It was a breathtaking scene in person. It was a hot mess on paper.
The first lesson one learns with watercolors is that the medium is unforgiving.
Unlike with acrylics or oils it is nearly impossible to remove or cover up mistakes, and I had just made a doozy. The blue sky was too saturated and the clouds chaotic. This was after countless hours working on the bottom section of the landscape, which was looking a bit less messy. Fighting the urge to crumple and toss it, I sought the counsel of our painting community.
Frank is a long-time member and retired Art teacher. I slapped my painting on the table for his critique and cringed. After thoughtfully studying my work for several moments he turned and said, “It looks as if this was done by two painters.” I could not agree more.
He and a few others conferred and gave suggestions on what could possibly improve the outcome. I walked away with renewed hope and got straight to work. With a tiny damp brush, I painstakingly teased the blue paint away from the clouds being careful not to tear the delicate paper. The irony made me smile. I was trying to push back the sky.
As I continued my watercolor surgery, fingers busy and mind drifting, I received a postcard from God.
Have you ever been blessed by one of these tiny prompts woven into the fabric of your day while your mind is ensconced in something else?
You most certainly have. They arrive in the most unexpected ways and are always perfectly timed.
God brought to mind a sermon I had heard years before. The topic was Rebekah and her twins who battled within her: “And the Lord said to her, ‘Two nations are in your womb, and two peoples from within you shall be divided; the one shall be stronger than the other, the older shall serve the younger,’” (Genesis 25:23b, ESV).
After unpacking the extensive cultural context of the passage, the Pastor changed gears, moving to its spiritual interpretation. In essence, the “older” represents our imperfect flesh born of our mothers; the “younger” our spiritual selves, born when we receive Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior. Our flesh will continually contend for dominion, but we must never give it the lead. This is why we commit to die daily.
A decade after hearing that sermon, the Lord used my unresolved painting as a visual of the chaos that two conflicting forces create. I then remembered Frank’s observation that two people had worked on my painting. He was right. I was determined to subdue the one so the other could prevail.
The Apostle Paul addresses this tension in Galatians 5:16-17 (ESV): “But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do.”
The battle rages within each of us. There are days when the wolf is undeniably at the door, his presence palpable: the heft of his frame, the stench of his breath, the steel of his gaze and glint of his claws. He oozes malevolence. He seems formidable in our weakness, but through Christ he meets his demise.
On those dark days, we rebuke our flesh and the Enemy that awakens it with Scripture and prayer. We remember that we are daughters of the King who has given us victory through salvation. Alleluia!
I gifted my reworked painting to my daughter, Kati. To her, it is a reminder of the beautiful week our family spent together one summer. To me, the exercise of pushing back the sky, a reminder that Jesus is our strength for pushing back every darkness and walking in Spirit, not in flesh.
